im really terrified that i will not be able to carry this baby to full term.
ive been pregnant 4 times but the last two i misscarried and my first one is with a different man. the last two were with my boyfriend.
no we werent trying it was just an accident. but now im pregnant again going on 4 and a half months and im just terrified and worried.
i dont undertand why i was able to carry my first baby to full term and not the other two. do you think it could have something to do with my bf?Some words of comfort and advice.?
I just wanted to let you know that I have also had two miscarriages and now have a beautiful, healthy (almost) 1 year old. I had some tests done prior to my most recent pregnancy and the miscarriages were put down to an awful coincidence. The last poster was right in saying 1 in 4-5 pregnancies ends in miscarriage so it was really just bad luck. It is very possible that this is the case with you too.
I completely understand how stressful it is to be pregnant after suffering a miscarriage. The constant worry didn't ease for me until 32 weeks when I realised that if I went into labour I had a great chance of having a healthy baby.
I wish I knew what could make it easier for you. The stress and worry will probably be there until you have your baby in your arms but all I can say is please try to enjoy your pregnancy as much as you can without letting it take over.... easier said than done I know.Some words of comfort and advice.?
There's a tiny tiny chance it could have to do with your boyfriend IF there is some kind of genetic issue he is passing on that is keeping your babies from developing properly. You might consider a genetic test if you can afford it. However, it's probably just a tragic coincidence. Try really hard not to worry. If you're worried and stressed all the time it's bad for the baby. Talk to the doctor too. I suppose it could also be possible that something happened with your first child that compromised your ability to bear children. Maybe. Discussing it with your doctor is really important though. In the meantime, just try to enjoy it and not stress.
Hi,
Very sorry to hear about your past two miscarriages. But have confidence, if you can make it through the first 20 weeks, which is in two weeks, chances are your baby is healthy!
Medical statistics show tat approximately 20% of recorded pregnancy is miscarried. And about 30 to 50% of these miscarriages are simply chromosomal abnormalities. (Sperm / egg defects, which can be random)
Unfortunately, females who have experienced multiple miscarriages are statistically more likely to experience further miscarriages than average females. However, don't let that discourage you! Studies also show that a healthy diet, proper sleeping schedule, and refraining from cigarettes, alcohol, and other substances, reduces the chance of miscarriage drastically.
In addition, doctors will take lots more precautions with pregnant females that's experienced two or more miscarriages, so make sure you consult your peds doctor for more detailed advice.
This is about as much as I got, wish you all the best!!
there is a disease where your immune system attacks the baby or something like that. but it doesnt happen the first time you are pregnant, im not sure what this is called but you should definitly look into because it is treatable
Miscarriages are a mystery most of the time. Have you discussed this with your doctor? It has nothing to do with your boyfriend.
maybe,but just pray and stay healthy.believe god can bring you through,if you believe in god.blessings!
Friday, July 30, 2010
Need some advice and words of encouragement?
well lets see my mom is single parent and she has 2 jobs now. i stay home all the time no joke and im 17. i have a twin sis and she just leave all the time with her boy friend so im stuck both weekdays and weekends watching kids,im really sick of it..i tell my mom that i am but i watch them anyways bcuz i dont want to let her down ..she needs my help but i cant take it anymore i need to live my out my teen years which i havent been able to do..so how should i go about telling my mom that i really cant take it anymore and that she needs to see it my way?Need some advice and words of encouragement?
Well you HAVE to tell your mom. You and your twin should share the responsibility of watching the littler kids. Period, point black. It's not fair that she has the opportunity to be free and young while you don't.
The three of you should talk it out.
Best of luck!Need some advice and words of encouragement?
First, she shouldnt have to see it your way. You all are a family, you should all see it everyone's way and work things out. Just because you are tired doesnt mean you quit your responsibilities. You must continue to contribute to the family's welfare, even if that means taking care of the kids. Your mother is working 2 jobs? What's keeping you from working? Seems you and your sister could participate more in the welfare of the family and stop making your mother do it all.
I totally agree with Husky. Why does your mum work two jobs anyway. Plenty of parents raise healthy kids on one job. You would do better to give us some luxaries and actually have a life. Your mother is totally letting you down. Also the younger kids need to see more of their mum.
You are all a family, sit down together and figure out a suitable plan of attack. You and your twin need to compromise on time spent with friends/boyfriend and taking care of younger siblings since your mom has to work. If she doesn't work then things will be so much tougher for your family. Maybe consider asking your mom to quit a job and you and twin sis each get a job instead (maybe part time after school) to help balance expenses. This way, she has time with the younger children and you each have a chance to feel independent and a little more useful.
Your mother needs to realise that SHE is her kids mother and not YOU. She is putting an adult burden on you and it is very very unfair. Every now and then is fine, say once a month or once a fortnight, but not all the time.
I am a single mum myself, and what she is doing is wrong. I would never ask my child to look after their siblings. She needs to sort out alternative arrangements or quite her job and get a better paying one. Like a night fill job, which generally pays much better.
She also needs to make your twin do 50/50.
Stick up for yourself, you have a right to be a teen. She has to realise this is HER responsibility and not yours.
Your mum should be proud of you but at the same time she should be giving you your own space and talk to your sister about helping out. maybe you and your sis can take turns, it's not fair on you, you need a life. you need to call a family meeting and tell them how you feel. then leave it up to them, hopefully they'll soon realise that the situation is taking a toll on you. they wont know unless you tell them
You, your sister and your mom all need to sit down together. You and your sister need to take turns watching your siblings. That way both of you get to go out one night on the weekends. Your sisters boyfriend can always come visit her when she is the one staying home. And your mom needs to put her foot down when it comes to your sister, and she better do it before your sister screws her own life up.
Talk to ur sis who is enjoying with boys,work out some plan that divides ur duty of taking care of kids.don't bother ur mom for that.
First find the suitable time when you will be able to talk to your mom don't talk to your mom when she is tired.
Second you need to pray for enlightenment how will you say it to your mom...Using the appropriate words make miracles.
Third you must continue to take care your siblings....
You can visit me: http://violet-heaven.blogspot.com
Well you HAVE to tell your mom. You and your twin should share the responsibility of watching the littler kids. Period, point black. It's not fair that she has the opportunity to be free and young while you don't.
The three of you should talk it out.
Best of luck!Need some advice and words of encouragement?
First, she shouldnt have to see it your way. You all are a family, you should all see it everyone's way and work things out. Just because you are tired doesnt mean you quit your responsibilities. You must continue to contribute to the family's welfare, even if that means taking care of the kids. Your mother is working 2 jobs? What's keeping you from working? Seems you and your sister could participate more in the welfare of the family and stop making your mother do it all.
I totally agree with Husky. Why does your mum work two jobs anyway. Plenty of parents raise healthy kids on one job. You would do better to give us some luxaries and actually have a life. Your mother is totally letting you down. Also the younger kids need to see more of their mum.
You are all a family, sit down together and figure out a suitable plan of attack. You and your twin need to compromise on time spent with friends/boyfriend and taking care of younger siblings since your mom has to work. If she doesn't work then things will be so much tougher for your family. Maybe consider asking your mom to quit a job and you and twin sis each get a job instead (maybe part time after school) to help balance expenses. This way, she has time with the younger children and you each have a chance to feel independent and a little more useful.
Your mother needs to realise that SHE is her kids mother and not YOU. She is putting an adult burden on you and it is very very unfair. Every now and then is fine, say once a month or once a fortnight, but not all the time.
I am a single mum myself, and what she is doing is wrong. I would never ask my child to look after their siblings. She needs to sort out alternative arrangements or quite her job and get a better paying one. Like a night fill job, which generally pays much better.
She also needs to make your twin do 50/50.
Stick up for yourself, you have a right to be a teen. She has to realise this is HER responsibility and not yours.
Your mum should be proud of you but at the same time she should be giving you your own space and talk to your sister about helping out. maybe you and your sis can take turns, it's not fair on you, you need a life. you need to call a family meeting and tell them how you feel. then leave it up to them, hopefully they'll soon realise that the situation is taking a toll on you. they wont know unless you tell them
You, your sister and your mom all need to sit down together. You and your sister need to take turns watching your siblings. That way both of you get to go out one night on the weekends. Your sisters boyfriend can always come visit her when she is the one staying home. And your mom needs to put her foot down when it comes to your sister, and she better do it before your sister screws her own life up.
Talk to ur sis who is enjoying with boys,work out some plan that divides ur duty of taking care of kids.don't bother ur mom for that.
First find the suitable time when you will be able to talk to your mom don't talk to your mom when she is tired.
Second you need to pray for enlightenment how will you say it to your mom...Using the appropriate words make miracles.
Third you must continue to take care your siblings....
You can visit me: http://violet-heaven.blogspot.com
Any advice? Perhaps words of encouragement?
I'm trying to whine or anything...I'm just kinda down I guess...and I know there are helpful people on here.
Ever since I was a kid I wanted to join the military. Never played with barbies, GI Joes baby! And I when I turned 17, I did join the Army. And I picked a job that would get me as close to the front lines as possible!...Military Police.
Well I'm in the Reserves and now I'm 24 weeks pregnant and I have a husband (i was single when I joined). I was about to volunteer for Iraq, (was actually supposed to leave in Jan) when I found out I was pregnant. I wanted to volunteer because I wanted to serve my country more than anything...but now...I'm going to have a son.
I'm supposed to have orders next year to deploy...my son will be about 1...and I hate it! Dont get me wrong, I still want to serve my country...but I don't know how I'll leave my baby or my husband! What do I say to a one year old when I know there's a chance I won't come home? What would you say?Any advice? Perhaps words of encouragement?
wow, i seriously don't know what to say
i have a one year old and can't imagine leaving him
you have a family now and it makes people look at life differently
just enjoy what you can now
and hope things will get better
good luck
;-)Any advice? Perhaps words of encouragement?
:( I don't know anything about enlisting in the army or anything -- but is there any way you can like... quit? Or do you have some sort of contract deal with them for a certain number of years? Is there any way out if you have a child? Or could you switch so your not a front-lines-woman? That would be heartbreaking to have to leave your baby knowing you may not even see him again.
im so seorry for you that is such a hard desision I really wouldnt know what to sayto my one year old im sorry that I cant help but you'll be in my prayers good luck and I hope you get an answer that will help you with this very very hard question once again Good luck
My husband is currently deployed for the second time. We just had our first son, so he is missing the whole first year of his life. Its hard, but many people are doing it right now. The best thing (if you do get deployed) is to have a webcam, lots of phone calls, and you should really get a video camera and tape yourself reading books, and talking to your son. This will insure that he will be able to see you everyday and remember you. Its hard, but you can do it.
Youre thinking too far ahead of your time and its only natural for a would be-mother like you.. I admire your love for your country but in this case you should choose between serving your country or staying with your family whom you love so much..
I will be praying and asking God for that feared day NOT to happen...with God's help, the war is over by then....
I cant pretend to imagine the situation you are in right now. That would be very difficult for me if i were in your position. If i were you.. and i understood that i might not come home.. i would make a video for my son/daughter if that should ever be the case.. letting them know why i went, and letting them know that i love them and wish i could have been there and letting them know things that are important for life..
A one year old will find it difficult to understand or comprehend what you are saying... I dont know that you can really explain it...
Spend the time that you have with them now.. live in the moment..
I would also ask yourself, if you are sure this is what you want to commit yourself to do.. its a big sacrafice and i know that many women and men have sacraficed themselves for the sake of your country.. but its a question that needs to be ask and its a question you need to answer..
Ask honest questions, get honest answers..
Truth is.. i couldnt leave if i had a one year old child.. their needs would come before the needs of others..
Im sorry, this may not help you.. but i hope that you find the answer you are looking for.. the answer that wont come from anyone else but yourself.
If you get rude answers ignore them sweetie....bunch of idiots...
I'm married to a marine so I know what you mean on this one...The best thing that you can do with a one year is just tell him that mommy is going away for a while but will be back. Don't concern yourself with telling a one year old that you may not come back. Whenever you get a chance to call home, call!! You can't really explain to a one year old what is going on. Just make sure that your husband shows your son pictures on you all the time and that he frequently talks about mommy and mommy is off being brave and maybe even show him some footage on tv of soliders or magazine clippings of them so that atleast he can place you in his mind of what you may be doing.
Good Luck and i'm sorry that this is so hard but I know exactly how it is.
truthfuly i think u need to talk to ur co about this bc he/she will be able to give u the best answers..... all u can do if u have to go is be truthful with ur son. and call write send pics as much as u can.. i have a 2 year old girl who'sdad is gone and he never calls her but thinks she will know him when he gets here to take her on his mid tour.....
I feel really bad for you. I mean really-really sad for you and your son. I do admire your dedication to our country. And I must say thank you. But, back to what you asked...what to say to a one year old when you leave. Well, I guess since he will be so young, you say you love him and you will see him soon. I hope he will have many pictures of you to look at. I hope your husband reminds your son about you everyday that you are away. I know your heart must be crumbling. It's very sad. I hope you won't have to stay in Iraq very long. I will keep you, and your son and husband in my prayers, along with the other men and women serving in the war. Best wishes to you!
I would get out of it.... When one of my friends had a baby she got out of the Air Force.... serving your country in nice but sometimes family needs to come first..... Think about it and see what you can do....
its up to you but either way. i hold the up most respect for you. you are a great women! some people could really learn a lesson by reading this .i wish you and your family the best and thank you for fighting for our country.. THATS AWESOME!! either way you are already a hero!!!
Ever since I was a kid I wanted to join the military. Never played with barbies, GI Joes baby! And I when I turned 17, I did join the Army. And I picked a job that would get me as close to the front lines as possible!...Military Police.
Well I'm in the Reserves and now I'm 24 weeks pregnant and I have a husband (i was single when I joined). I was about to volunteer for Iraq, (was actually supposed to leave in Jan) when I found out I was pregnant. I wanted to volunteer because I wanted to serve my country more than anything...but now...I'm going to have a son.
I'm supposed to have orders next year to deploy...my son will be about 1...and I hate it! Dont get me wrong, I still want to serve my country...but I don't know how I'll leave my baby or my husband! What do I say to a one year old when I know there's a chance I won't come home? What would you say?Any advice? Perhaps words of encouragement?
wow, i seriously don't know what to say
i have a one year old and can't imagine leaving him
you have a family now and it makes people look at life differently
just enjoy what you can now
and hope things will get better
good luck
;-)Any advice? Perhaps words of encouragement?
:( I don't know anything about enlisting in the army or anything -- but is there any way you can like... quit? Or do you have some sort of contract deal with them for a certain number of years? Is there any way out if you have a child? Or could you switch so your not a front-lines-woman? That would be heartbreaking to have to leave your baby knowing you may not even see him again.
im so seorry for you that is such a hard desision I really wouldnt know what to sayto my one year old im sorry that I cant help but you'll be in my prayers good luck and I hope you get an answer that will help you with this very very hard question once again Good luck
My husband is currently deployed for the second time. We just had our first son, so he is missing the whole first year of his life. Its hard, but many people are doing it right now. The best thing (if you do get deployed) is to have a webcam, lots of phone calls, and you should really get a video camera and tape yourself reading books, and talking to your son. This will insure that he will be able to see you everyday and remember you. Its hard, but you can do it.
Youre thinking too far ahead of your time and its only natural for a would be-mother like you.. I admire your love for your country but in this case you should choose between serving your country or staying with your family whom you love so much..
I will be praying and asking God for that feared day NOT to happen...with God's help, the war is over by then....
I cant pretend to imagine the situation you are in right now. That would be very difficult for me if i were in your position. If i were you.. and i understood that i might not come home.. i would make a video for my son/daughter if that should ever be the case.. letting them know why i went, and letting them know that i love them and wish i could have been there and letting them know things that are important for life..
A one year old will find it difficult to understand or comprehend what you are saying... I dont know that you can really explain it...
Spend the time that you have with them now.. live in the moment..
I would also ask yourself, if you are sure this is what you want to commit yourself to do.. its a big sacrafice and i know that many women and men have sacraficed themselves for the sake of your country.. but its a question that needs to be ask and its a question you need to answer..
Ask honest questions, get honest answers..
Truth is.. i couldnt leave if i had a one year old child.. their needs would come before the needs of others..
Im sorry, this may not help you.. but i hope that you find the answer you are looking for.. the answer that wont come from anyone else but yourself.
If you get rude answers ignore them sweetie....bunch of idiots...
I'm married to a marine so I know what you mean on this one...The best thing that you can do with a one year is just tell him that mommy is going away for a while but will be back. Don't concern yourself with telling a one year old that you may not come back. Whenever you get a chance to call home, call!! You can't really explain to a one year old what is going on. Just make sure that your husband shows your son pictures on you all the time and that he frequently talks about mommy and mommy is off being brave and maybe even show him some footage on tv of soliders or magazine clippings of them so that atleast he can place you in his mind of what you may be doing.
Good Luck and i'm sorry that this is so hard but I know exactly how it is.
truthfuly i think u need to talk to ur co about this bc he/she will be able to give u the best answers..... all u can do if u have to go is be truthful with ur son. and call write send pics as much as u can.. i have a 2 year old girl who'sdad is gone and he never calls her but thinks she will know him when he gets here to take her on his mid tour.....
I feel really bad for you. I mean really-really sad for you and your son. I do admire your dedication to our country. And I must say thank you. But, back to what you asked...what to say to a one year old when you leave. Well, I guess since he will be so young, you say you love him and you will see him soon. I hope he will have many pictures of you to look at. I hope your husband reminds your son about you everyday that you are away. I know your heart must be crumbling. It's very sad. I hope you won't have to stay in Iraq very long. I will keep you, and your son and husband in my prayers, along with the other men and women serving in the war. Best wishes to you!
I would get out of it.... When one of my friends had a baby she got out of the Air Force.... serving your country in nice but sometimes family needs to come first..... Think about it and see what you can do....
its up to you but either way. i hold the up most respect for you. you are a great women! some people could really learn a lesson by reading this .i wish you and your family the best and thank you for fighting for our country.. THATS AWESOME!! either way you are already a hero!!!
Depression - advice/help/words of wisdom?
i'm going to grad school in the fall, so i have something ot look forward to.
i don't have a summer job and really have no money, so i don't go out of my apartment much. i go for walks every day and i cook food for fun, but mostly, there isn't much i consider fun and more and more i find it harder to get out of bed. plus, i've been SO tired, i sleep like 12 hours a day. i've been trying to find a job, but no call backs.
i don't have friends in my life and my family ... well, they're downers and being around them makes me feel worse.
i kinda feel like life and time are just passing me by.
it's only june, and i'm afraid the hole might get deeper as the summer goes along. help?
oh, and i don't have health insurance and, like i said, i don't have a job or money, so please don't suggest i go see a doctor.Depression - advice/help/words of wisdom?
I hear several issues here. Sounds like you know what answers to expect so maybe you just need to bounce them off someone (strangers).
Here are some suggestions. You pick what you think might apply to you:
You are looking forward too far when you look at autumn. Look at tomorrow morning or this afternoon. Plant some flowers and look forward to blossoms or stick a tomato in a pot and look forward to fruit. You need more immediate rewards. Invite a neighbor over or a fellow student and plan a special meal, maybe cook on the grill, make a light salad dressing. Then you'll have something to look forward to. Who cares if you make a friend? It'll be fun.
Cook light. Eating carbs is immediate reward but can make you tired. Eat more raw veggies and less pasta. Drink fresh water. Get plenty of B vitamins (or take a supplement). Stay away from onions and meat as these can make you sleepy. Drink mint tea and take Ginseng to perk you up. No more than 10 or 12 ounces of soda pop a day.
Get a funky job that is way beneath you. It's just a summer job. Work at McDonald's, a car wash or parking attendant or pushing carts at the supermarket. Volunteer at the animal shelter. If you haven't applied at 100 places, in this economy, you're not even trying. Take a part time job that no one else wants. Get involved helping at a church camp or ask at the police department what organizations need a warm body this summer. Try to get something that will keep you on your feet and outdoors.
Your tiredness is probably just mild depression. But it can be a symptom of something physical going on too. Are you prone to anemia? Take iron %26amp; B vitamins Low thyroid? Kelp supplements and avoid fluoride. Just getting over an infection? Boost your immune system with Ginkgo, Gotu Kola, Ginseng and vitamins A, C %26amp; E.Depression - advice/help/words of wisdom?
there is a medicine for depression which cured me completely.Its a combination of ginseng+ashwagandha+20 ingredines which are complete safe with no side effects.Beauty is it can be taken with english medicines with no side effects at all. mail me at* karan_depression@yahoo.com * for more...
Volunteer to help a Charity! There are so many opportunities to help others. In helping others, you will help yourself too!
American Red Cross
American Cancer Society
Salvation Army
Your local church
Meals on Wheels
Your local hospital
You can call your local chamber of commerce. They will have a list of local charities. Just pick one and call them. Tell the people at the charity that you want to volunteer. They will love to have you!
Best wishes and good luck. And ... have a great summer helping yourself by helping others.
Energy shifts are happening right now for everyone, and things are going to be turning around by the end of June after the summer solitice, so hang in there and just know everyone is going through some energy shifts right now, just some are hitting others harder.
http://www.healingartforms.com/apps/blog鈥?/a>
I found that a gluten free diet was the only thing that really helped with depression.
man up.
Sorry that you are feeling this way I know how awful this feeling is.
I understand that you didn't want suggestions about going to the doctor but, please just hear me out.
Try a mental health clinic, they do blood work there also, it's how I found out about my thyroid problem.
They charge on a sliding fee scale.
I went for a year and it cost me fifteen dollars and I was able to make payments on just that small amount.
Keep your focus on Grad school as much as you can.
Best wishes.
What kinds of food are you cooking for fun? Are they loaded with white sugar, white flour, fat, sodium? I found that my moods improved when I started finding ways to cook healthier foods for myself. I still enjoy making sweet treats, but I take them to gatherings so other people can eat them.
One other suggestion is to write a simple list of positives each morning. Start with 1, then work your way up to as many as you can.
And if boredom is a problem, perhaps you could find volunteer work until you get a job?
i don't have a summer job and really have no money, so i don't go out of my apartment much. i go for walks every day and i cook food for fun, but mostly, there isn't much i consider fun and more and more i find it harder to get out of bed. plus, i've been SO tired, i sleep like 12 hours a day. i've been trying to find a job, but no call backs.
i don't have friends in my life and my family ... well, they're downers and being around them makes me feel worse.
i kinda feel like life and time are just passing me by.
it's only june, and i'm afraid the hole might get deeper as the summer goes along. help?
oh, and i don't have health insurance and, like i said, i don't have a job or money, so please don't suggest i go see a doctor.Depression - advice/help/words of wisdom?
I hear several issues here. Sounds like you know what answers to expect so maybe you just need to bounce them off someone (strangers).
Here are some suggestions. You pick what you think might apply to you:
You are looking forward too far when you look at autumn. Look at tomorrow morning or this afternoon. Plant some flowers and look forward to blossoms or stick a tomato in a pot and look forward to fruit. You need more immediate rewards. Invite a neighbor over or a fellow student and plan a special meal, maybe cook on the grill, make a light salad dressing. Then you'll have something to look forward to. Who cares if you make a friend? It'll be fun.
Cook light. Eating carbs is immediate reward but can make you tired. Eat more raw veggies and less pasta. Drink fresh water. Get plenty of B vitamins (or take a supplement). Stay away from onions and meat as these can make you sleepy. Drink mint tea and take Ginseng to perk you up. No more than 10 or 12 ounces of soda pop a day.
Get a funky job that is way beneath you. It's just a summer job. Work at McDonald's, a car wash or parking attendant or pushing carts at the supermarket. Volunteer at the animal shelter. If you haven't applied at 100 places, in this economy, you're not even trying. Take a part time job that no one else wants. Get involved helping at a church camp or ask at the police department what organizations need a warm body this summer. Try to get something that will keep you on your feet and outdoors.
Your tiredness is probably just mild depression. But it can be a symptom of something physical going on too. Are you prone to anemia? Take iron %26amp; B vitamins Low thyroid? Kelp supplements and avoid fluoride. Just getting over an infection? Boost your immune system with Ginkgo, Gotu Kola, Ginseng and vitamins A, C %26amp; E.Depression - advice/help/words of wisdom?
there is a medicine for depression which cured me completely.Its a combination of ginseng+ashwagandha+20 ingredines which are complete safe with no side effects.Beauty is it can be taken with english medicines with no side effects at all. mail me at* karan_depression@yahoo.com * for more...
Report Abuse
Volunteer to help a Charity! There are so many opportunities to help others. In helping others, you will help yourself too!
American Red Cross
American Cancer Society
Salvation Army
Your local church
Meals on Wheels
Your local hospital
You can call your local chamber of commerce. They will have a list of local charities. Just pick one and call them. Tell the people at the charity that you want to volunteer. They will love to have you!
Best wishes and good luck. And ... have a great summer helping yourself by helping others.
Energy shifts are happening right now for everyone, and things are going to be turning around by the end of June after the summer solitice, so hang in there and just know everyone is going through some energy shifts right now, just some are hitting others harder.
http://www.healingartforms.com/apps/blog鈥?/a>
I found that a gluten free diet was the only thing that really helped with depression.
man up.
Sorry that you are feeling this way I know how awful this feeling is.
I understand that you didn't want suggestions about going to the doctor but, please just hear me out.
Try a mental health clinic, they do blood work there also, it's how I found out about my thyroid problem.
They charge on a sliding fee scale.
I went for a year and it cost me fifteen dollars and I was able to make payments on just that small amount.
Keep your focus on Grad school as much as you can.
Best wishes.
What kinds of food are you cooking for fun? Are they loaded with white sugar, white flour, fat, sodium? I found that my moods improved when I started finding ways to cook healthier foods for myself. I still enjoy making sweet treats, but I take them to gatherings so other people can eat them.
One other suggestion is to write a simple list of positives each morning. Start with 1, then work your way up to as many as you can.
And if boredom is a problem, perhaps you could find volunteer work until you get a job?
I am getting married soon........any words of wisdom or advice please?
don't....I am getting married soon........any words of wisdom or advice please?
dont cheat and pray lolI am getting married soon........any words of wisdom or advice please?
be happy and good luck
Oh my goodness.
1) Read ';Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus'; by John Gray TOGETHER with your fiance AND discuss it! It's the best thing my husband and I ever did, and it's stopped SO MANY potential arguments and made us SUCH better communicators. I'm not even kidding... seriously. Read it. Please. It will be the best-spent time you will ever spend. I can't rant enough about it.
2) Decide now who will manage the money in the relationship: who's going to pay the bills? Who's going to pay the taxes? You? Him/Her? Mostly him/her but you help? Both of you equally?
3) Decide now how many kids you both want. Do you have vastly different ideas of how many?
4) Decide now on how your kids will be disciplined- is he/she pro-spanking but you'd never dream of it, or are you a big fan of time-out but your sweetheart doesn't think it's an effective discipline technique?
5) Decide now (especially if you two are from different religions) which religion (if any) your kids will be raised with. This is a BIG argument-causer and potential divorce-causer.
6) What are your plans about debt? Talk about it. What will you go into debt for (house? car? school?)? What will you not go into debt for? What are you going to do about existing debt?
7) If you've both waited till marriage (rare nowadays but very applaudable) talk about sex. Read some good books on it (not just the Kama Sutra, but informational books telling you about male and female responses during sexual activity).
That's all the advice I have for now.... PLEASE READ THAT BOOK..... good luck and I wish you the best!
I suggest taking a sharp razor blade and cutting deeply and horizontally along your wrist and then immerse your wrist in running water...
It will basically take 5 to 10 minutes to do what your wife will do to you over the next few years but without all the anguish:)
Good luck with it
make sure its what u want all relationships change after marriage
Don't freak out. It's going to be cool. You guys will grow old together and have beautiful grandchildren.
Just do 3 things
- look pretty
- cook
- don't talk to much
You'll be fine!
U are already getting married, That itself is showing a great wisdom. Nothing more to advice, be happy and always make her happy.
Good Luck and my advise is to NEVER, ever, EVER go to bed angry....ever.
GOOD LUCK
Confess everything to each other. Think honestly if the other person is a psycho. If not, good luck. If so, change your mind while you are still single. Have an honest talk about money. Do you have different spending habits, different levels of debt, different earning power?
Make sure that you know deep down that you could spend the rest of your life pleasing your spouse and know that they will do the same for you. Another important thing, make sure you have common future goals. (ex. It won't be a great idea to get married if you want kids and the other person doesn't). Congrats on your upcoming marriage.
Don't cheat, follow the 10 Commandments to help your marriage go smoothly, pray, and remember to always trust each other but don't overly trust. Good comes to those who wait and God is always there to help you. Also, before anything gets better it has to get worse so be patient and don't rush things.
Pray.
be kind to each other.
Keep the lines of communication open.
Say what you mean and mean what you say.
Keep the romance up even when it's difficult and life seems to get in the way.
Respect eachother.
Always say ';I love you'; when parting company... even if you are mad, you never know when it might be the last time.
Compromise.
Help eachother and be supportive.
Most of all love eachother.
Adapt common sense, logic, observation and understand each other with equal respect. These apply to both man and woman.
Both of you should be complimentary to each other.
A good husband should be deaf - A good wife blind.
This Section Call Marriage %26amp; Divorce !! Don't Forget This !!!
DON';T DO IT MAN.......RUN......LOL
Just kidding good luck.
Just love her and let her love you.
just don't screw it up...
Well if you have a loving and sweet fiance, and if you take care of him, compromise with him when arguing, and love him to the most you can, and are always there for him, you are gonna have a great marriage. Also, dont hide stuff from him because that really ruins a relationship sometimes.
Hope this helps :)
ive just got married i found the right one, been married 2 months it was the best day ive ever had, really was the dogs, i panicked about my Speech don't know why cos it come out really good, good luck, i hope it goes as good as mine did
Learn how to enjoy celibacy.
-If you're spiritual people, pray together.
-Don't go to bed angry. Solve any problems before you go to sleep at night.
-Keep the lines of communication wide open. Make your spouse feel like he/she can say anything to you.
-Keep ';dating'; you spouse. Set aside one night a week for a date... dinner, movies, etc.
-Be romantic. Don't stop being spontaneous.
Congrats!
Always keep the lines of communication open and honest. Never go to bed angry. Never with hold sex from your partner as a form of (immature) punishment. Think before you speak, a spoken word cannot be taken back. And always remember their is always room for compromise. Always consider the feelings of your spouse; treat them as you would like them to treat you. And consider their feelings in everything you do; you are no longer one but two coming together as one.
Be very sure - work through any doubts BEFORE tying the knot. Have you/they done growing up, or do you need to ';play'; some more?
Talk - really talk.
Discuss what it is you think marriage is, and what your role is within in it, and see if your prospective partner has the same ideas/ideals. Are you to be a Traditional couple? A Modern one? A combination of the two? What is and isn't allowed in your image of what marriage is.
Do you two want kids? How many and when? This IS a major issue for most couples. KNOW what the other wants/expects.
What are your goals and ambitions, for your life and for your marriage? How well do they match?
Do you want holidays at home, or more exotic locations? New cars, a small/large suburban/city/country home/unit/apartment, further education/training, a better paying job/less work hours? To stay put, putting roots down deep, or to move around?
Talk money. Want savings, or a ';C'est le vie'; lifestyle? How do you feel about credit/money/savings/debts, etc? How does your partner stand financially? How does that make you feel and how will that affect your lives together, and your future? When/where would you like to retire, and how are you going to fund that?
Remain committed - if you say I do, mean it. And not just for the day either. Love is not just a feeling, its a verb, a doing word. Live the love - gentle words, respect, compassion, understanding, and faithfulness.
Hope that helps a bit.
Don't leave God (Jesus) out of your life or marriage and it will last.
Yes, both of you should complete this:
http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Married-Until鈥?/a>
A. Do you guys love each other? Love and sex are totally different things. B. Can you guys afford a marriage? If yes to both of these, congratulations. Marriage is wonderful thing, and keep in mind, your spouse comes first. Good luck.
talk don't keep things bottled in...never go to bed angry
Don't let the little stuff get to you. Apologize if you are in the wrong. Love each other deeply. Unless something is done that's really wrong, don't just give up. Marriage is work...24 hours, 7 days a week. But it's all worth it. Don't go to bed angry. Don't take each other for granted. Kiss each other hello and goodbye each and every time. Just love and be happy. Lots of luck. My husband and I have been married for 7 1/2 years, I was 19 when we got married, him 21. It wasn't always easy, especially in the beginning and not even always now...but it's so worth it. Oh and 1 more thing...communication is key.
dont cheat and pray lolI am getting married soon........any words of wisdom or advice please?
be happy and good luck
Oh my goodness.
1) Read ';Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus'; by John Gray TOGETHER with your fiance AND discuss it! It's the best thing my husband and I ever did, and it's stopped SO MANY potential arguments and made us SUCH better communicators. I'm not even kidding... seriously. Read it. Please. It will be the best-spent time you will ever spend. I can't rant enough about it.
2) Decide now who will manage the money in the relationship: who's going to pay the bills? Who's going to pay the taxes? You? Him/Her? Mostly him/her but you help? Both of you equally?
3) Decide now how many kids you both want. Do you have vastly different ideas of how many?
4) Decide now on how your kids will be disciplined- is he/she pro-spanking but you'd never dream of it, or are you a big fan of time-out but your sweetheart doesn't think it's an effective discipline technique?
5) Decide now (especially if you two are from different religions) which religion (if any) your kids will be raised with. This is a BIG argument-causer and potential divorce-causer.
6) What are your plans about debt? Talk about it. What will you go into debt for (house? car? school?)? What will you not go into debt for? What are you going to do about existing debt?
7) If you've both waited till marriage (rare nowadays but very applaudable) talk about sex. Read some good books on it (not just the Kama Sutra, but informational books telling you about male and female responses during sexual activity).
That's all the advice I have for now.... PLEASE READ THAT BOOK..... good luck and I wish you the best!
I suggest taking a sharp razor blade and cutting deeply and horizontally along your wrist and then immerse your wrist in running water...
It will basically take 5 to 10 minutes to do what your wife will do to you over the next few years but without all the anguish:)
Good luck with it
make sure its what u want all relationships change after marriage
Don't freak out. It's going to be cool. You guys will grow old together and have beautiful grandchildren.
Just do 3 things
- look pretty
- cook
- don't talk to much
You'll be fine!
U are already getting married, That itself is showing a great wisdom. Nothing more to advice, be happy and always make her happy.
Good Luck and my advise is to NEVER, ever, EVER go to bed angry....ever.
GOOD LUCK
Confess everything to each other. Think honestly if the other person is a psycho. If not, good luck. If so, change your mind while you are still single. Have an honest talk about money. Do you have different spending habits, different levels of debt, different earning power?
Make sure that you know deep down that you could spend the rest of your life pleasing your spouse and know that they will do the same for you. Another important thing, make sure you have common future goals. (ex. It won't be a great idea to get married if you want kids and the other person doesn't). Congrats on your upcoming marriage.
Don't cheat, follow the 10 Commandments to help your marriage go smoothly, pray, and remember to always trust each other but don't overly trust. Good comes to those who wait and God is always there to help you. Also, before anything gets better it has to get worse so be patient and don't rush things.
Pray.
be kind to each other.
Keep the lines of communication open.
Say what you mean and mean what you say.
Keep the romance up even when it's difficult and life seems to get in the way.
Respect eachother.
Always say ';I love you'; when parting company... even if you are mad, you never know when it might be the last time.
Compromise.
Help eachother and be supportive.
Most of all love eachother.
Adapt common sense, logic, observation and understand each other with equal respect. These apply to both man and woman.
Both of you should be complimentary to each other.
A good husband should be deaf - A good wife blind.
This Section Call Marriage %26amp; Divorce !! Don't Forget This !!!
DON';T DO IT MAN.......RUN......LOL
Just kidding good luck.
Just love her and let her love you.
just don't screw it up...
Well if you have a loving and sweet fiance, and if you take care of him, compromise with him when arguing, and love him to the most you can, and are always there for him, you are gonna have a great marriage. Also, dont hide stuff from him because that really ruins a relationship sometimes.
Hope this helps :)
ive just got married i found the right one, been married 2 months it was the best day ive ever had, really was the dogs, i panicked about my Speech don't know why cos it come out really good, good luck, i hope it goes as good as mine did
Learn how to enjoy celibacy.
-If you're spiritual people, pray together.
-Don't go to bed angry. Solve any problems before you go to sleep at night.
-Keep the lines of communication wide open. Make your spouse feel like he/she can say anything to you.
-Keep ';dating'; you spouse. Set aside one night a week for a date... dinner, movies, etc.
-Be romantic. Don't stop being spontaneous.
Congrats!
Always keep the lines of communication open and honest. Never go to bed angry. Never with hold sex from your partner as a form of (immature) punishment. Think before you speak, a spoken word cannot be taken back. And always remember their is always room for compromise. Always consider the feelings of your spouse; treat them as you would like them to treat you. And consider their feelings in everything you do; you are no longer one but two coming together as one.
Be very sure - work through any doubts BEFORE tying the knot. Have you/they done growing up, or do you need to ';play'; some more?
Talk - really talk.
Discuss what it is you think marriage is, and what your role is within in it, and see if your prospective partner has the same ideas/ideals. Are you to be a Traditional couple? A Modern one? A combination of the two? What is and isn't allowed in your image of what marriage is.
Do you two want kids? How many and when? This IS a major issue for most couples. KNOW what the other wants/expects.
What are your goals and ambitions, for your life and for your marriage? How well do they match?
Do you want holidays at home, or more exotic locations? New cars, a small/large suburban/city/country home/unit/apartment, further education/training, a better paying job/less work hours? To stay put, putting roots down deep, or to move around?
Talk money. Want savings, or a ';C'est le vie'; lifestyle? How do you feel about credit/money/savings/debts, etc? How does your partner stand financially? How does that make you feel and how will that affect your lives together, and your future? When/where would you like to retire, and how are you going to fund that?
Remain committed - if you say I do, mean it. And not just for the day either. Love is not just a feeling, its a verb, a doing word. Live the love - gentle words, respect, compassion, understanding, and faithfulness.
Hope that helps a bit.
Don't leave God (Jesus) out of your life or marriage and it will last.
Yes, both of you should complete this:
http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Married-Until鈥?/a>
A. Do you guys love each other? Love and sex are totally different things. B. Can you guys afford a marriage? If yes to both of these, congratulations. Marriage is wonderful thing, and keep in mind, your spouse comes first. Good luck.
talk don't keep things bottled in...never go to bed angry
Don't let the little stuff get to you. Apologize if you are in the wrong. Love each other deeply. Unless something is done that's really wrong, don't just give up. Marriage is work...24 hours, 7 days a week. But it's all worth it. Don't go to bed angry. Don't take each other for granted. Kiss each other hello and goodbye each and every time. Just love and be happy. Lots of luck. My husband and I have been married for 7 1/2 years, I was 19 when we got married, him 21. It wasn't always easy, especially in the beginning and not even always now...but it's so worth it. Oh and 1 more thing...communication is key.
Advice, Support & Words of Wisdom, Being Induced Tomorrow A.M.?
hello everyone,
so my due date is March 20th which happens to be tomorrow and im being induced at 7 am. On tuesday at my last appointment the doctor said i was dilated 2 cm, but i feel perfectly fine, the only reason im being induced is because I have a very lazy baby boy and rather than monitoring him via ultrasounds and NST, she figure since ill be 40 weeks, why stress me out with more monitoring and testing and just have me have him in my arms.
All looks fine but he hasnt been the average active baby and im not really looking like 40 weeks, but he is weighing in per ultrasound review at 6.7 and that was last week i believe (sorry had some many ultrasounds im not even sure anymore), we arent sure if its because i have an anterior placenta that i cant feel much movement but in all honesty im scared as all hell. I hate hospitals and needles and being in pain. This is my 1st for me and my husband and we are as excited as can be but i cant find any words of wisdom to help me through the thought.
Further, everyone that i have spoken too about being induced say contractions are much more intense than if i go into labor on my own and trhen i hear most end in csections.
HELPPPPPPPPPP !
NO RUDE COMMENTS, IM 25, so i am more than able to provide and care for a child, just figure i wouldnt be induced figure i have the movie type of birth, water breaking, contractions, etvc..
Thanks everyone !Advice, Support %26amp; Words of Wisdom, Being Induced Tomorrow A.M.?
Ask for an epidural and you won't feel a thing. They gave me one the same time they started inducing me. I didn't feel a thing. I freaked out so bad though because I too am so scared of needles. They had to give me medicine to calm me down through my iv before the epi. And you know it didn't hardly hurt at all.Advice, Support %26amp; Words of Wisdom, Being Induced Tomorrow A.M.?
Everything will be fine, I was induced with my last two children and those were the easiest deliveries for me (out of four)....Good luck and this time tomorrow you will be holding your bundle of joy :)
God go with you honey
congrats too :)
Yay! You are having your baby on the first day of spring! I was induced with my son (5 years ago) and the labor did last a long time, but I had an epidural, so most of it was slept through. : )
You should be fine as long as you concntrate on you and making that baby come out. I don't know what it is but for some reason when you go to deliver your baby your fears go awaY (mostly). Honestly, what I tried to keep in mind the whole time was ';women have been doing this for all of time and it started out where the did not he any medicine or technology... so if they can do it, so can I'; .. it helped. I did not require a c~section and I know plenty of ladies who were induced and gave birth just fine. Congratulations! Good luck! I am so jealous that you get to have your baby boy tomorrow! : )
well you will be fine I have been induced in the past and still had my kids fast with no meds and natural. I have said this before im a very small women and I did fine. Just relax and you will be ok.And think of this if u live all this time with a living thing kicking and moving ur insides u can do anything. A determine focus woman can do anything she puts her mind to. good luck and congras
I was induced with my son 17 years ago. It was terrible because, for starters, the nurse didn't put the IV in my vein. It went in my tissues which caused a minor infection later. Bad part was, the pitocin (Inducing drug) didn't work fast enough because it wasn't in my vein, so my labor lasted 9 hours before they finally broken my water. Then something bad happened. The cord flushed out in front of the head and prolasped. I ended up having an emergency c-section after 17 total hours of labor. I had to be put to sleep too, which sucked. Bottom line, make sure they do the IV right, and if they break your water, make sure the baby's head is down there far enough that the cord won't get flushed out with the water. I think you will be fine thou so don't worry. A lot of women get induced every day. I think I was just one of the unlucky ones. ha
I wish you the best and congrats on your little baby boy!!!
PS I'm not trying to scare you. I just wanted to give you the advice to look out for certain things. :)
well I have some advice for you. I have 5 children from 12years to 11mo and i was induced with all but 1. They were all over 8lbs my largest was 10lbs and to tell you the truth i only had drugs with the onw i went into labor with. The only thing is you need to be calm, remember it is not going to last forever. If they break your water your labor will be alot stronger. Dont Eat it will make you sick. If you need to scream,cuss whatever do it. Try to get up nd move, showers are great. I think I lived in there!! But remember once you see your baby you will not remember anything about it. Oh Yea I did not have a c-section once. Good Luck Tomorrow!!!
so my due date is March 20th which happens to be tomorrow and im being induced at 7 am. On tuesday at my last appointment the doctor said i was dilated 2 cm, but i feel perfectly fine, the only reason im being induced is because I have a very lazy baby boy and rather than monitoring him via ultrasounds and NST, she figure since ill be 40 weeks, why stress me out with more monitoring and testing and just have me have him in my arms.
All looks fine but he hasnt been the average active baby and im not really looking like 40 weeks, but he is weighing in per ultrasound review at 6.7 and that was last week i believe (sorry had some many ultrasounds im not even sure anymore), we arent sure if its because i have an anterior placenta that i cant feel much movement but in all honesty im scared as all hell. I hate hospitals and needles and being in pain. This is my 1st for me and my husband and we are as excited as can be but i cant find any words of wisdom to help me through the thought.
Further, everyone that i have spoken too about being induced say contractions are much more intense than if i go into labor on my own and trhen i hear most end in csections.
HELPPPPPPPPPP !
NO RUDE COMMENTS, IM 25, so i am more than able to provide and care for a child, just figure i wouldnt be induced figure i have the movie type of birth, water breaking, contractions, etvc..
Thanks everyone !Advice, Support %26amp; Words of Wisdom, Being Induced Tomorrow A.M.?
Ask for an epidural and you won't feel a thing. They gave me one the same time they started inducing me. I didn't feel a thing. I freaked out so bad though because I too am so scared of needles. They had to give me medicine to calm me down through my iv before the epi. And you know it didn't hardly hurt at all.Advice, Support %26amp; Words of Wisdom, Being Induced Tomorrow A.M.?
Everything will be fine, I was induced with my last two children and those were the easiest deliveries for me (out of four)....Good luck and this time tomorrow you will be holding your bundle of joy :)
God go with you honey
congrats too :)
Yay! You are having your baby on the first day of spring! I was induced with my son (5 years ago) and the labor did last a long time, but I had an epidural, so most of it was slept through. : )
You should be fine as long as you concntrate on you and making that baby come out. I don't know what it is but for some reason when you go to deliver your baby your fears go awaY (mostly). Honestly, what I tried to keep in mind the whole time was ';women have been doing this for all of time and it started out where the did not he any medicine or technology... so if they can do it, so can I'; .. it helped. I did not require a c~section and I know plenty of ladies who were induced and gave birth just fine. Congratulations! Good luck! I am so jealous that you get to have your baby boy tomorrow! : )
well you will be fine I have been induced in the past and still had my kids fast with no meds and natural. I have said this before im a very small women and I did fine. Just relax and you will be ok.And think of this if u live all this time with a living thing kicking and moving ur insides u can do anything. A determine focus woman can do anything she puts her mind to. good luck and congras
I was induced with my son 17 years ago. It was terrible because, for starters, the nurse didn't put the IV in my vein. It went in my tissues which caused a minor infection later. Bad part was, the pitocin (Inducing drug) didn't work fast enough because it wasn't in my vein, so my labor lasted 9 hours before they finally broken my water. Then something bad happened. The cord flushed out in front of the head and prolasped. I ended up having an emergency c-section after 17 total hours of labor. I had to be put to sleep too, which sucked. Bottom line, make sure they do the IV right, and if they break your water, make sure the baby's head is down there far enough that the cord won't get flushed out with the water. I think you will be fine thou so don't worry. A lot of women get induced every day. I think I was just one of the unlucky ones. ha
I wish you the best and congrats on your little baby boy!!!
PS I'm not trying to scare you. I just wanted to give you the advice to look out for certain things. :)
well I have some advice for you. I have 5 children from 12years to 11mo and i was induced with all but 1. They were all over 8lbs my largest was 10lbs and to tell you the truth i only had drugs with the onw i went into labor with. The only thing is you need to be calm, remember it is not going to last forever. If they break your water your labor will be alot stronger. Dont Eat it will make you sick. If you need to scream,cuss whatever do it. Try to get up nd move, showers are great. I think I lived in there!! But remember once you see your baby you will not remember anything about it. Oh Yea I did not have a c-section once. Good Luck Tomorrow!!!
I need some SERIOUS advice/words of encouragement?
ok so i am currently 30 weeks pregnant. my husband lost his job a couple of week back and has not been able to find work as of yet. i am on bedrest due to preterm labor so i cannot participate in our income right now. money was already REALLY tight for us. we have a 3 year old already and we are coming to realize that we may not be able to properly provide for our new baby. we live in a one bedroom aprtment only and cannot afford anything bigger. we already struggle to make ends meet and to feed and clothe the son we already have. i love my new lil baby more than life itself and thought that we could do this but as i get closer to me due date i am realizing that we cant! i really want the best for my baby and want him to have a good life. i am literally crying my eyes out right now as i am typing this and am considering adoption. it hurts me to even say that and i feel like such a horrible mother! i love him sooooo much but i want what is best for him, and unfortunately it doesnt look like i am it! i am deeply hurt and depressed and i am coming here for advice on what to do/where to start because i really have no clue how adoption works or where i should even start. if anyone has advice that would be wonderful and please dont judge me i already feel horrible enough as it is. thanks so muchI need some SERIOUS advice/words of encouragement?
Listen to yourself. You are already in a state of panic at the THOUGHT of giving him up. Can you imagine what it will be like to actually give him up. It will only be worse. What will you tell his 3 year old brother? And what will you tell your son? He will always wonder why he wasn't good enough to be your son. No matter how you try, he will have a difficult time accepting that you loved him so much you gave him away. This little guy is part of your family. Families stick together through good times and bad. If you want what is best for him you need to give him YOU.I need some SERIOUS advice/words of encouragement?
Your not a horrible mother, and most certainly you are not failing your children because things are difficult right now. I know it's easy for me to say what your family is going through is only temporary. But it is, it's not forever, and things do change and will change in a moments time.
As for adoption, it is permanent and so is the life-long suffering of losing your child.
Government assistance exists to help families who need it. You need help.
Get the benefits/help. Don't give away your child.
Adoption is also a government program. The government has no interest in your family once you give up your baby. You won't have any rights and your child will no longer have any legal connection to you or to your other child.
Katie,
I am so sorry to hear the situtation you are in. It must be hard, but remember you need to stay strong. I would be happy to help you find assistance on which ever path you choose for your baby. If you would like to email me, soontobeself@yahoo.com I would be happy to help.
i'd have to suggest you seek government assistance. its less stressful for you and your children instead of going through the hassle of an abortion or adoption process. plus you love your children dont you?
You can always get government assitance as horrible as that sounds. But for the time being you do need the help in raising your family.
Do you have any family members who could help you out?
There are places that give away free diapers and things like that.
There are plenty of ways you can make this work.
It doesn't take money to love your child and treat them well. These are hard times for lots of people, but in your heart you know you want your child. My mom (not pregnant, God help me if she was) has also just fallen on the hard times of this economy and is currently (and temporarily) living with us. We are there to help her get back of her feet. Is there anyone if your life who can assist with support for you. Maybe someone who can babysit while you work? Can you move the budget around?
But man you are not a horrible mother you are someone having a hard time. We have all been there.
I know a family who didn't believe in waiting until they had money to raise a family and boom boom boom ahd there two boys. They raised them on an income of 20-30K, and I have never seen a happier family.
Email me if you want to chat more, and I try to live by the motto: This too shall pass.
If someone was thinking of suicide I would say to them it is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This can be said too of some adoptions. You can do this, you just need to breathe, calm down, treat yourself good, and start doing some creative thinking about how you can make this work for you.
I'm so sorry. I know, from experience, some of what you are facing right now.
Adoption, I know, sometimes feels like the answer when the desperation is so overwhelming. Many mothers before you have been there and faced the same fears and uncertainty. But, what so many of us never realized was that the situation we were facing were temporary while adoption is permanent.
Please seek help for yourself and both your children. That is what it is there for and there is so much more available outside of just the government programs that exist. Please feel free to email me here through yahoo and I will help you locate help in your area.
That loss you are already feeling with just the thought of losing your child to adoption, never goes away and, more than likely, will grow even stronger and more painful as the years pass by.
You are already a good mother to your first child. You will be a good mother to this child as well. So many people hit hard times in their life where they need some help and support to keep them going. That is all you are facing right now. A time to reach out for some help through the programs that are designed to give you just that.
But, please do not let this convince you that you will in any way be less of a mother to your child. Your child needs you. He or she deserves to be with his or her mother and father and sibling.
Being wealthier, married, successful, etc . . . does not make a good parent. You make a good parent just by the very fact you are already worrying about what is best for your child. That is what I hope you will see and understand.
NOBODY will ever be able to give your child the life you want for him or her, expect for you.
You won't be on bed rest forever.
He'll get a job.
This is TEMPORARY. Adoption is permenent.
How would you feel if you husband gets a great job the day after you sign away your baby?
Hang in there. Stop crying. Wrap 1 arm around your 3 year old, and the other around your baby bump and repeat after me...
THIS TOO WILL PASS
THIS TOO WILL PASS
THIS TOO WILL PASS
When your husband comes home, make him rub your feet and chant with you...
THIS TOO WILL PASS!
Also...
THIS situation is exactly what government assistance was made for. Emergency help for families that is temporary to help them over a ';rough patch';.
You aren't a bad person for taking help when you need it.
If the situation was reversed, and your friend was going through this, wouldn't you help?
Haven't you donated to charity in the past?
Well, now's your opportunity for others to help you.
I had a friend in the same boat. Her husband couldnt find work anywhere. He ended up joing the armed forces and now they have a comfortable home and insurance. Its not the life for everyone but if adoption is to painful maybe that could be worth looking into. They also gave him a sign on bonus. So sorry hope things turn around for you.
Hi,
I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this! You mention that you already, ';feel horrible enough as it is';. Don't. You sound like an EXCELLENT mother that is doing the best she get and one that unforutnatly, is at a crossroads. There are a few things you can consider:
1) Public Assistance. It's there to help people in situation just like yours. Consider contacting them.
2) Having a family member help support the baby until thing straighten out for you.
3). Adoption.
With adoption, be careful of the agencies as they sometimes try to push mothers into giving up their babies. In many ways it can be an industry. At the end of the day you have to look into your heart and decide what is best for you and your children.
My husband and I are currently looking to adopt and have found that there are goods and bads to the process. Many mothers that give their children for adoption are doing so to provide them with more stability. Consider looking through your local church etc., before going to an agency. Should you decide on an agency, call around and make sure they'll let you have a hand in who is picked for your child (and how much openess you want--yearly updates etc).
Take your time and weigh all your options before making a decision. I'm sure you'lll choose what's best for all involved.
adoption is a last resort for parents who are not able to love their kids and who will be putting their kids in danger by keeping them. this doesn't sound like you. being poor is hard, but it's not going to be permanant. you are considering a permanent solution to a temporary problem. you need to get help somewhere but your child only has one real mother and that is you. there are services in place to help families in your situation. move in with your parents or in laws if you have to, until the two of you can get on your feet. maybe there is a local church that can help you out along with social services, get food stamps. whatever you have to do, do it. the recession won't last forever. i wouldn't consider adoption for poverty unless you are planning to take up permanant residence in a cardboard box.
As diffucult as things seem now, heep your head up! This baby was created with love and no matter what you choose, as a parent when the time comes...your choice will be the right one. Think of the future for your children. Children, espically babies need alot of stuff, but they need love the most! If you can spare enough love, you will make it just fine. My husband and i live in a 1 bedroom appartment with our 8 month old. He was laid off 2 weeks ago, i know how you feel. As long as my daughter has what she needs im happy going without.
Well, I am sorry for your situation. Hopefully, your husband will find a job soon and once you deliver + 6weeks you can get a job or go back to the one you had. Use Social Services, that is exactly why they are there. You have paid into these programs while working. They also have grant available to people who are laid off to retrain them in a high demand job, look into it at the Labor Dept.
How can anyone judge such a heartfelt plea for help. You are considering a loving thing...despite the pain. Please visit the Canadaadopts.com site to get great information about all of this but we are also listed there under the Parent Registry. We are Lynn and Richard. Please feel free to learn about us and our adopted son Matthew. You can contact us directly at northpoll@shaw.ca or through Joanne Conlin, our practitioner. She is amazing. It's all on the site. Good luck to you and stay strong. A good mother walks through pain to provide for her child. You are a good mother. BTW...we have an open adoption with our son's birth mother, including visits once a year and emails too. It can be done with love if you feel it's what you want to do.
Listen to yourself. You are already in a state of panic at the THOUGHT of giving him up. Can you imagine what it will be like to actually give him up. It will only be worse. What will you tell his 3 year old brother? And what will you tell your son? He will always wonder why he wasn't good enough to be your son. No matter how you try, he will have a difficult time accepting that you loved him so much you gave him away. This little guy is part of your family. Families stick together through good times and bad. If you want what is best for him you need to give him YOU.I need some SERIOUS advice/words of encouragement?
Your not a horrible mother, and most certainly you are not failing your children because things are difficult right now. I know it's easy for me to say what your family is going through is only temporary. But it is, it's not forever, and things do change and will change in a moments time.
As for adoption, it is permanent and so is the life-long suffering of losing your child.
Government assistance exists to help families who need it. You need help.
Get the benefits/help. Don't give away your child.
Adoption is also a government program. The government has no interest in your family once you give up your baby. You won't have any rights and your child will no longer have any legal connection to you or to your other child.
Katie,
I am so sorry to hear the situtation you are in. It must be hard, but remember you need to stay strong. I would be happy to help you find assistance on which ever path you choose for your baby. If you would like to email me, soontobeself@yahoo.com I would be happy to help.
i'd have to suggest you seek government assistance. its less stressful for you and your children instead of going through the hassle of an abortion or adoption process. plus you love your children dont you?
You can always get government assitance as horrible as that sounds. But for the time being you do need the help in raising your family.
Do you have any family members who could help you out?
There are places that give away free diapers and things like that.
There are plenty of ways you can make this work.
It doesn't take money to love your child and treat them well. These are hard times for lots of people, but in your heart you know you want your child. My mom (not pregnant, God help me if she was) has also just fallen on the hard times of this economy and is currently (and temporarily) living with us. We are there to help her get back of her feet. Is there anyone if your life who can assist with support for you. Maybe someone who can babysit while you work? Can you move the budget around?
But man you are not a horrible mother you are someone having a hard time. We have all been there.
I know a family who didn't believe in waiting until they had money to raise a family and boom boom boom ahd there two boys. They raised them on an income of 20-30K, and I have never seen a happier family.
Email me if you want to chat more, and I try to live by the motto: This too shall pass.
If someone was thinking of suicide I would say to them it is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This can be said too of some adoptions. You can do this, you just need to breathe, calm down, treat yourself good, and start doing some creative thinking about how you can make this work for you.
I'm so sorry. I know, from experience, some of what you are facing right now.
Adoption, I know, sometimes feels like the answer when the desperation is so overwhelming. Many mothers before you have been there and faced the same fears and uncertainty. But, what so many of us never realized was that the situation we were facing were temporary while adoption is permanent.
Please seek help for yourself and both your children. That is what it is there for and there is so much more available outside of just the government programs that exist. Please feel free to email me here through yahoo and I will help you locate help in your area.
That loss you are already feeling with just the thought of losing your child to adoption, never goes away and, more than likely, will grow even stronger and more painful as the years pass by.
You are already a good mother to your first child. You will be a good mother to this child as well. So many people hit hard times in their life where they need some help and support to keep them going. That is all you are facing right now. A time to reach out for some help through the programs that are designed to give you just that.
But, please do not let this convince you that you will in any way be less of a mother to your child. Your child needs you. He or she deserves to be with his or her mother and father and sibling.
Being wealthier, married, successful, etc . . . does not make a good parent. You make a good parent just by the very fact you are already worrying about what is best for your child. That is what I hope you will see and understand.
NOBODY will ever be able to give your child the life you want for him or her, expect for you.
You won't be on bed rest forever.
He'll get a job.
This is TEMPORARY. Adoption is permenent.
How would you feel if you husband gets a great job the day after you sign away your baby?
Hang in there. Stop crying. Wrap 1 arm around your 3 year old, and the other around your baby bump and repeat after me...
THIS TOO WILL PASS
THIS TOO WILL PASS
THIS TOO WILL PASS
When your husband comes home, make him rub your feet and chant with you...
THIS TOO WILL PASS!
Also...
THIS situation is exactly what government assistance was made for. Emergency help for families that is temporary to help them over a ';rough patch';.
You aren't a bad person for taking help when you need it.
If the situation was reversed, and your friend was going through this, wouldn't you help?
Haven't you donated to charity in the past?
Well, now's your opportunity for others to help you.
I had a friend in the same boat. Her husband couldnt find work anywhere. He ended up joing the armed forces and now they have a comfortable home and insurance. Its not the life for everyone but if adoption is to painful maybe that could be worth looking into. They also gave him a sign on bonus. So sorry hope things turn around for you.
Hi,
I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this! You mention that you already, ';feel horrible enough as it is';. Don't. You sound like an EXCELLENT mother that is doing the best she get and one that unforutnatly, is at a crossroads. There are a few things you can consider:
1) Public Assistance. It's there to help people in situation just like yours. Consider contacting them.
2) Having a family member help support the baby until thing straighten out for you.
3). Adoption.
With adoption, be careful of the agencies as they sometimes try to push mothers into giving up their babies. In many ways it can be an industry. At the end of the day you have to look into your heart and decide what is best for you and your children.
My husband and I are currently looking to adopt and have found that there are goods and bads to the process. Many mothers that give their children for adoption are doing so to provide them with more stability. Consider looking through your local church etc., before going to an agency. Should you decide on an agency, call around and make sure they'll let you have a hand in who is picked for your child (and how much openess you want--yearly updates etc).
Take your time and weigh all your options before making a decision. I'm sure you'lll choose what's best for all involved.
adoption is a last resort for parents who are not able to love their kids and who will be putting their kids in danger by keeping them. this doesn't sound like you. being poor is hard, but it's not going to be permanant. you are considering a permanent solution to a temporary problem. you need to get help somewhere but your child only has one real mother and that is you. there are services in place to help families in your situation. move in with your parents or in laws if you have to, until the two of you can get on your feet. maybe there is a local church that can help you out along with social services, get food stamps. whatever you have to do, do it. the recession won't last forever. i wouldn't consider adoption for poverty unless you are planning to take up permanant residence in a cardboard box.
As diffucult as things seem now, heep your head up! This baby was created with love and no matter what you choose, as a parent when the time comes...your choice will be the right one. Think of the future for your children. Children, espically babies need alot of stuff, but they need love the most! If you can spare enough love, you will make it just fine. My husband and i live in a 1 bedroom appartment with our 8 month old. He was laid off 2 weeks ago, i know how you feel. As long as my daughter has what she needs im happy going without.
Well, I am sorry for your situation. Hopefully, your husband will find a job soon and once you deliver + 6weeks you can get a job or go back to the one you had. Use Social Services, that is exactly why they are there. You have paid into these programs while working. They also have grant available to people who are laid off to retrain them in a high demand job, look into it at the Labor Dept.
How can anyone judge such a heartfelt plea for help. You are considering a loving thing...despite the pain. Please visit the Canadaadopts.com site to get great information about all of this but we are also listed there under the Parent Registry. We are Lynn and Richard. Please feel free to learn about us and our adopted son Matthew. You can contact us directly at northpoll@shaw.ca or through Joanne Conlin, our practitioner. She is amazing. It's all on the site. Good luck to you and stay strong. A good mother walks through pain to provide for her child. You are a good mother. BTW...we have an open adoption with our son's birth mother, including visits once a year and emails too. It can be done with love if you feel it's what you want to do.
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